Family Bites

10 Things You Can Do to Prep for Thanksgiving

This week – the one leading up to Thanksgiving - is one of my favourites of the year. I intentionally clear my calendar so I can spend several days prepping the big meal, organizing activities for the kids, adding a little festive décor to the house, and planning far too much food for our larger-by-the-year crowd. I’ve learned a lot about cooking this meal over the years and have a few ideas to help us all feel completely in control. Here are my suggestions:

1. Find Butter on Sale

If I’m really on the ball I’ll start looking for good-quality butter on sale in the weeks leading up Thanksgiving. When I find it I stock up and put anywhere between six to ten pounds in my freezer because Thanksgiving is not the time to worry about calories and cholesterol. I don’t know what it is, but when I’m low on butter I start to feel twitchy and the surplus keeps me calm while cooking a big meal. If I’m not thinking ahead, and only notice my butter supply is low a few days before the holiday (gasp!), I just type the word into my favourite flyer app, source the best product/price and hop in the car in search of my holiday meal’s best friend and ultimate flavour booster.

2. Make Cranberry Sauce

Homemade cranberry sauce couldn’t be easier or more economical to make so please don’t tell me you buy the kind in the can. Instead, take 10 or 15 minutes tonight (yes, TONIGHT!) and make a batch. It will keep well in the refrigerator until you need it on Sunday or Monday. It’s these small steps taken over the course of a few days leading up to the holiday that make cooking this meal so much easier than you might expect. When I’m out buying my butter tonight I hope to see a few of you in the grocery store with a bag or two of cranberries in hand. (Side Note: Apply the same make-ahead philosophy to your side dishes by examining them for tasks that can be completed in advance - like blanching veggies and toasting nuts.)

3. Make Pie Crust

Ditto for the pie crust. Even if you haven’t completely decided what kind of pie you want to make for dessert (hand raised!) stashing a few discs of frozen dough in the freezer will make your life easier and make you feel like the domestic goddess you are. Having said that, if you want to go the store-bought frozen pie dough route feel free. No judgement here. For real.

4. Plan Your Menu

I can’t emphasize this enough. If you are hosting Thanksgiving dinner this weekend and you don’t know what you’re making stop reading right now and go plan your menu. Just kidding. Don’t stop reading. But do start thinking about what you’re going to serve your family and friends, and try to have a plan in place before the end of the day.

Summer Vacation Rituals

I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that trying to find a family-friendly activity that pleases everyone in the house was a bit of a challenge. With fourteen and three-quarters years between son number one and son number three, the age difference makes it nearly impossible to execute an outing that’s of equal interest to everyone involved. For example, we can take Matthew to a neighbourhood park or local splash pad and he responds with a level of enthusiasm that is unmatched by anyone else in our house, most especially the teenagers. Can you blame them? The older boys are thrilled to try a new restaurant (when in doubt just promise them food and they’ll find enjoyment in going almost anywhere), watch a movie, play basketball, pool, or tennis, all of which aren’t exactly toddler-friendly fun. So, what’s a family to do? Fortunately, the answer is simple: eat ice cream.

Six weeks ago we started a new summer vacation ritual that just might be one of our most favourite to date. Every week, we scour local blogs and online articles for reviews and insider info on the best ice cream in the city, and on Saturday or Sunday we set off in search of a new-to-us scoop shop. So far we’ve tried Asian gelato, Italian gelato, ice cream tacos, soft serve dipped in maple hard shell and a nostalgic favourite from my own childhood. We’ve had ice cream in Toronto, Kingston, and Mont-Tremblant this month, and all five of us, baby included, have delighted in the experience.

Our weekend ritual turned into a daily one last week when we left town for a short getaway. We wanted to see how Matthew would hold up in the car on a road trip, and he passed the seven-hour ride with flying colours. We won’t be making the trek to the Carolina coast this year, one of our favourite summer destinations, but feel confident he might be up for the drive next year, once he gets a little more road tripping mileage under his belt. Last week we went to Quebec instead, and on the day we arrived we established a new rule: immediately set out to find the sweetest ice cream shop in town and visit it each afternoon between afternoon siestas and swimming at the pool. Again, we found an activity that everyone from toddler to teen to tired parent could agree on. Actually, make it three activities: afternoon naps, cold ice cream cones, and poolside fun.

Three Meals to Make for the People You Love

It's a long weekend, it's cold, and I can't imagine wanting to do anything other than what I have planned for the next three days: cozying up at home with my peeps and cooking all the things in order to keep us warm and well fed. I have Italian wedding soup on the menu, not to mention an eight-hour slow cooked pork roast, bolognese, banana muffins and some sort of sweet treat for my big and little loves. If, like me, you think it's too cold to venture outdoors this weekend, here are some suggested kid-approved meals you might want to make for the people you love on Sunday.

The Sweet and Simple Menu:

• White Minestrone Soup with Roast Chicken 
• The Easiest Chocolate Cake Ever (top with red, white and pink sprinkles)

The How-to-Please-Your-Teenagers Menu:

• Slow-Cooker Pulled Beef Poutine
• Whole Wheat Brownies

The Entertaining/Date Night Menu:

• Pretzel Chicken with Creamy Mustard Sauce
• Sweet Heart Pavlovas

This is 40

I turned 40 earlier this month. It’s a birthday I was looking forward to, if only because I’ve witnessed how this fifth decade of life has been good to Rob and his growth as person, and I’ve been looking forward to experiencing a little of that myself. Truth be told, I don’t feel any different than I did three weeks ago, which is really just a way of saying that despite what my birth certificate says, my head is still convinced that I might only be 25.

Even though my birthday falls just 10 days after Christmas, my friends and family happily donned their party planning hats, and I literally spend a week celebrating my milestone birthday with some of my favourite people. From a home cooked dinner with cake and presents on the actual day, to a dinner out with a few of my favourite food-writing friends the next night, the early part of the week was feted in sweet yet simple ways. It was the weekend following my birthday that Rob, who knew I didn’t want a big party, got a little more creative by planning not one or two, but THREE different gatherings with varying groups of people.

Two Truths and a Lie

You’d think my days of trying to entertain the older boys at the dinner table were done, now that they’re old enough to talk about politics and current events*, but I recently discovered that’s definitely not the case.

During a humdrum dinner, with not much conversation – my pet peeve – I asked the boys to tell me about their day. They kind of grumbled, the way teenage boys are wont to do, so I suggested that instead of just stating one thing they had done, they should get specific by telling me three facts, but the catch was that only two of them could be true and the other had to be a lie.

Instantly, they perked up in their seats and began plotting their stories. After five minutes or so, we all took turns trying to stump each other with our lie, and dinner quickly took a turn in the direction of fun. During clean-up Jackson asked me if we could do it again the next day. I emphatically agreed; after all, how else would I know he’s able to say the word “cow” 94 times in one breath?

*Just because they’re old enough, doesn’t mean they do. :)

The Anatomy of a Busy Weekend Family Feast

Our Sunday suppers were put on the back burner this summer, mostly because it was difficult to coordinate everyone being available and in town at the same time. I didn’t mind too much, though. There’s a season for everything, and summer might not be the time to try and corral everyone for dinner on a bi-weekly basis.

Now that school is back in session, I decided to kick off September with the first Sunday Supper of the fall, and while it was admittedly foolish to invite 15 family members for dinner on the same weekend that Rob was out of town, Ben was playing in a hockey tournament, Jackson had a social calendar penciled full of more plans than I’ve had in the past six months, and the baby is teething, it was a surprisingly simple task thanks to five minutes of advanced planning and a meal made of nothing but make-ahead foods.  Here’s how I got it done:

Saturday - 10:30 a.m.: Jackson has a scheduled guitar lesson at our house at that time, so I plunked Matthew into the highchair with a snack and sent Ben upstairs to do homework while I made a double batch of our favourite chilli. 

Saturday - 8:00 p.m. After the first hockey game of the day, dinner out with the boys, getting Matthew settled for the night and sending Ben off to another game, I went into the kitchen and made an apple cake for the next day’s dessert, as well as a party mix (see below) for Sunday afternoon pre-dinner snacking during the baseball/football games and tennis match that I knew would be on TV.

Sunday – 8:30 a.m. I prepped the cornbread by whisking the dry ingredients into a bowl and stirring the wet ingredients in a glass measuring cup, which I covered and popped into the fridge. I made sure there was enough milk and water for the kids, and I made a list of the beer I needed to pick up on my way home from hockey.

Sunday 2:30 p.m. After the last hockey game of the weekend, I secured the beer, slid the chilli into the oven to warm, combined the cornbread ingredients and baked them into a fluffy dinner accompaniment. Jackson and I also worked together to whip up some quick-pickled jalapeños, a must-have condiment in our house (also, if you try this recipe you’ll never buy them again), and grated a big chunk of cheddar cheese.

Sunday 4:30 p.m. Fifteen of our favourite family members arrived. I set out bowls of pretzels, crackers, hummus and party mix, passed around cold beer and cider, and quickly assembled a condiment tray with the jalapeños, hot sauces, cheese, and sour cream. I cut the cornbread and placed it into a breadbasket, and set out bowls, plates, spoons, and cups for the kids.

Sunday 5:30 p.m. The chili was removed from the oven and I announced that dinner would be self-serve from the stovetop. Everyone helped themselves, we crowded nine kids around our table – baby included – while the adults ate and watched sports. The apple cake followed, and was served with vanilla ice cream and coffee, and the house was empty and returned to order by 7:30pm.

Toffee and Pretzel Party Mix

I saw the new Martha Stewart book, Appetizers, at Costco last week, and when I glanced through the pages, one party snack mix in particular caught my eye. In addition to the typical cereal/pretzel/nuts combo, this one also included toffee bits, which when melted, bind some of the ingredients together to create a sweet and salty treat that people can’t seem to get enough of. While I don’t have a photographic memory, I did take note of the recipe and this is my version of what I saw.

• 2 cups square wheat cereal (like Shreddies)
• 1 cup pecans
• 1 cup peanuts
• 1 cup pretzel sticks
• ½ cup toffee bits
• ½ cup butter
• 1 Tbsp. fresh rosemary, chopped
• 1 Tbsp. brown sugar
• 1 Tbsp. prepared or Dijon mustard
• 1 teaspoon kosher salt

1. Preheat the oven to 325° and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

2. Combine cereal, nuts, pretzels and toffee bits in a bowl and set aside.

3. Melt the butter. Add the rosemary, brown sugar, mustard and salt. Stir well and pour over the dry ingredients. Toss to combine.

4. Spread the mixture in a single layer on the prepared baking sheet, and bake for 15 minutes or until the toffee is melted.

5. Cool and break into pieces. Store in an airtight container for up to a week.

On Birthday Parties

My baby – not the one I’m currently growing, but the one who’s been the youngest in our house since his birth – is officially a teenager today. Part of me wants to weep over the fact that these two darling kids of mine are more like men then boys these days, but then I think about how very much I like them (more and more each year, in fact), and about how we’ll have a newborn again in a matter of weeks, and I push those pregnancy hormones back where they belong, and carry on celebrating in his excitement that he’s old enough for so much more now that he’s no longer a child (snort).

We had a party for him here yesterday, something we’ve done since both kids were born. For a few years it was just family, then friends rolled into the mix and we generally hosted a second celebration to include them, and now we’re back to the family parties with weekend sleepovers, or something similar, coordinated by the boys themselves and their friends (FYI… they don’t really sleep, it’s just an excuse to have friends stay over all night so they can extend the movie watching/game playing hours as late as possible, simultaneously making the next day totally unbearable for everyone involved, particularly the parents).

While I do have to mentally prepare myself a little to have anywhere from four to six teenage boys in the house for the night (the secret to success: plenty of food, and an ignorance of the wrestling, mini stick games, and occasional curse word that slips out), I’ve long been an advocate of the at-home birthday party, and I’m going to put myself on an unofficial mission to bring it back when my it’s time for our third child to have his yearly bash with friends.

There is no right or wrong way to throw a birthday celebration, but in the almost fifteen years since I’ve become a parent it’s practically become a competitive sport (it isn’t), even though less is definitely more when it comes to kids and parties (trust me). Instead, I say, bring back the traditional party menu, basic birthday cake, handmade decorations, and games that are only limited by that which can be imagined. If you put your focus on where your strengths lie, hosting a bunch of kids will be easy and enjoyable. For example, if you are more interested in assembling handmade decorations than baking a birthday cake, don’t hesitate to let someone else supply the sweet treats for you for goodness sake. After all, assuming the average parent has two children, they will likely be responsible for hosting/arranging more than 30 birthday parties for their children over the course of their childhood, and you certainly don’t want it to be a source of stress at any time.

Here’s what our party plan has looked like over the years, in case you’re looking for a guide for yourself:

Ages 1-4: Family dinner party only (parents, siblings, grandparents, aunt, uncles, cousins, maybe a few close family friends)

Ages 5-12: Family dinner party (see above), and a friends-only celebration

Ages 13+: Family dinner party (see above) and kid-organized sleepover or home-based celebration

Jackson’s self-organized 13^th birthday soiree is happening this Saturday. At the moment we have four 12-13 year olds sleeping over and the plan is to make a list of mom-approved movies for the night, stock the fridge full of snacks (more on this next week) and leave piles of blankets and pillows at the bottom of the stairs for the kids to help themselves to, when they decide they’re tired. Or in other words: prep everything in advance so the parents don’t have to really be a part of the party at all. Oh, the next few years are going to be fun, aren’t they?

So, since there’s no judging allowed here, I’m curious to know: what do birthday parties look like in your home?

P.S. The photos above were hung from balloons just like I did when Ben turned 13. 

Cinnamon Palmiers

One of the smartest things Rob and I did when our boys were born was to quickly establish a solo night out once a week for each of us. He had a tendency to take every Thursday night, as that’s when his friends would meet up at a driving range, followed by chicken wings and beer at a nearby pub. I took whatever night worked best for me, or the friends I was meeting up with for dinner and/or a movie, but we had an unspoken rule that neither of us went out alone on a Friday or Saturday night, as those nights were reserved for us.

We did this for years – probably seven or eight – until the boys reached an age where homework and hockey, and all other types of extra-curricular activities, took precedence and our free time during the week was truly at a premium. Our friends were busy with their work and families too, so it worked out well for everyone, but we still encouraged each other to get out alone when possible, even if it was just for a run, a pedicure, or a peruse through the bookstore. 

I don’t know that we’ll repeat the practice of solo nights out when our baby arrives. The older boys keep our calendar pretty full so I imagine we won’t have the luxury of the same free time that we had all of those years ago. It’s okay though  - we’ve learned that we do need some time away from the house on our own (it’s makes us better parents and partners) and as long as we plan for it, we can almost always make it work, even if there’s a baby in the house.

The boys would say that while they don’t require any kind of solo time, they’re definitely in need of homemade cookies as often as possible, and truth be told I sometimes find it challenging to keep up with the demand given how voracious their appetites are. My new secret is to keep a few rolls of puff pastry in the freezer, making palmiers – those classic French pastry-cookie combos - a possibility whenever the requirement strikes. These three-ingredient cookies are easy enough for the kids to make on their own, as evidenced by the picture above, and tasty enough that even their mom will sneak a few from the stash to accompany her afternoon hot chocolate/magazine reading break from time to time. 

Cinnamon Palmiers

These are perfect for serving alongside a small pot of chocolate pudding, something we've been doing regularly for Sunday supper, or for dipping into mugs of hot cocoa after school.

• 1/3 cup granulated or cane sugar
• 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 1 sheet frozen puff pastry, defrosted

In a small bowl, whisk together the sugar and cinnamon. Scatter half the sugar over a flat work surface (counter, table, cutting board) and press the puff pastry sheet onto the sugar.

Spread the remaining sugar evenly over the top of the puff pastry and, using a rolling pin, shape it into a 10" x 13" rectangle, pressing the sugar into the pastry as you go. 

Starting at the short end of the rectangle, fold one end over halfway to the middle of the pastry. Fold the other side over the same way, and then fold each side in half again so the folded edges come together in the middle. Fold once more so the folded halves are stacked on top of each other. Wrap tightly in plastic wrap and chill for a minimum of 30 minutes. 

When ready to bake, preheat the oven to 400° and line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Remove the plastic wrap and cut the pastry rolls into 1/2" thick pieces (about 24 per roll) and place them face up on the baking sheets spacing them 2" apart. Bake for 10-12 minutes, or until caramelized and brown on the bottom, then flip with a spatula and cook for an additional 3-5 minutes or until caramelized on the other side. Allow to cool for a few minutes before transferring to a cooling rack. 

Optional: Melt 4oz dark chocolate in the microwave or on the stove top using the double-broiler method. Dip half the palmier into the melted chocolate, then transfer to a parchment-lined baking sheet to set. 

Date Nights at Home

I have made very few food resolutions for the coming year. I’m not dieting, nor do I have any plans to drastically change my family’s eating habits, mostly because I think we’re doing okay right now. Sure, we could always eat just that much healthier, but the reality is that I’m happy with the food that makes it onto our table each week, and my real goal is just to keep our family dinners and Sunday suppers intact amidst busy schedules and growing children.

However, the one area I do want to place some extra focus on in 2015 is our date nights at home, an almost weekly ritual Rob and I have put into practice for nearly fifteen years. Date-night dinners began about a decade and a half ago; Rob and I set-out to “keep the romance alive” amid the happy chaos that accompanied new parenthood and two baby boys born just twenty months apart. I’m not exactly sure who came up with the idea, but we decided early on that it might be nice to have an adults-only dinner once a week.  No kids, no phones, no computers – no interruptions.  There were exceptions of course, and the guidelines have changed over the years, but I’m so happy that our weekly at-home date is still going strong.

In fact, I feel so passionately about the topic that I included a small chapter on this essential get-together in Gatherings. I truly believe that a gathering is no less significant if there are only two people at the table instead of ten, and I’m certain that this intimate event will be some of the best “gathering” I do in my lifetime. If I can encourage even just one couple to add a weekly at-home date night to their calendar, I think their family will benefit in so many ways. 

It's possible to think that because my kids are older it’s easy to keep these date nights going strong, but the harsh reality is exactly the opposite: the older the kids are, the less free time in the evening we have have. Sure, they can and often prefer to occupy themselves, but there are also carpools, sports, music lessons, and homework to compete for any extra free time that's available. The kids stay up later than they ever have, and are often looking for food and snacks just as we might be thinking about winding down for the night, so while free time is anything but plentiful, we’ve built a habit of enjoying a weeknight date alone at home, and now our kids respect  - and encourage - the time as well. And secretly I’m hoping they’ll be so used to the idea of it, they’ll implement it into their own relationships some day.

The challenge we’ll face this year, is keeping it going with two teens a new baby in the house, which is why it’s moved to the top of my priority list.  Our time will need to be divided a little differently in the coming year, and we’re both making some changes to accommodate for that, but I’m hopeful that date-nights at home will continue for the next fifteen years, as we see our third child through to the teen years. After all, those who eat together stay together. I totally made that up, but after almost seventeen years of experience I stand by what I’m saying.

So, who's up for a date night at home revolution in 2015? Do any of you put this idea into practice in your own family already? You can expect more posts on the topic in the coming year, as we figure out how to keep the romance alive with a three boys – a baby and two growing teens - in the house.

Family Supper Sundays

Back in the summer, Rob and I spent a lot of time talking about how we wanted to bring our extended family together more frequently for shared meals. We see each other at birthdays and other holidays, but we don’t gather often for casual meals with our parents and/or siblings unless there is a special occasion clearly marked on the calendar.

As we were having these discussions, we also noticed that our boys wanted to spend most of their free time on the weekends with their friends, a natural behaviour of most tweens and teens, and Sunday afternoons often came with a request to go to someone’s house to watch football, or to invite a friend over for the day. I was starting to notice how much I disliked having our family divided up at the end of the weekend, and felt that having dinner together was an important way to finish off the fun of the previous two days.

The solution to both situations we were discussing suddenly became obvious, and at the beginning of September we launched what is affectionately known as Family Supper Sundays. The meal is exactly as the name suggests: every Sunday night we have dinner at our house and invite all of the (locally-living) members of our extended family. It’s mandatory that our own boys are here, and they are welcome to invite friends (and, eventually, girlfriends) to come too, but they know and understand that their presence is non-negotiable.